Never give up by Nick Vujicic

SOMETIMES PEOPLE ARE NOT MEANT TO LEAVE WHERE THEY BELONG. BE YOURSELF AND FIND YOUR HAPPINESS

As I promised on Twitter I am getting ready to finish this blog out regarding my first eBook LIFE LESSON ON BEING GOOD ENOUGH by S.L. Melendez. I admit I don't have a lot of money to do fancy advertising but that is okay. I have been really examining things with a fine tooth comb and taking notes on how my eBook could have been better. I'm a little disappointed but I will NEVER give up my love for writing. I am however getting ready to start a new blog for my second eBook. There are so many ideas brewing in my head but I can't really give you a hint just yet except that it will be pertaining to the paranormal. My first eBook was relating to all the issues that ever really either irked me or that I felt strong about. I am very fascinated with anything paranormal. This includes ghost and haunted houses, true life accounts of peoples experiences, spirits, demons, aliens, witches, shape shifters, you name it I'm intrigued:) Halloween is definitely one of two of my favorite holidays. (Christmas is my first but because of religious reasons. Meh presents are cool but not everything. Anyways... I will now start my new posting. I was busy for a short time. I just started back to school and I might be working a new job pretty soon. Lets keep my fingers crossed and please keep me in your prayers if you will. I would sure appreciate it:)


So I have been hearing a number of accounts where people are moving to a state they never moved to but decided to move back. They moved back for a number of reasons. I actually moved 1,980 miles away which is almost two days away from a lot of where my family is. I have not seen my family for six years. I miss them a lot and hope maybe by this summer at least I get go see them. Finances just didn't work out but okay. I'm not going to dwell on that. I applaud the people who at least try to follow their dreams in search of happiness. If they come home because they found crap there that they did not know was going to be at their destination its okay. They are NOT failures!  Its okay if they decide they would rather just go home to their support systems because what they found will never benefit them.  I don't see that as failure but I do see it as there is something more awesome waiting for them at home, and they get another chance to discover it. If the person is truly happy going back then more power to him or her. In my case I left because I felt unloved and unappreciated at the time back in June of 2009. I have had time to realize my family did indeed love and miss me. It took me leaving to realize it. Things just kept happening for me though here in ID that made me not want to give up and back track. In my mind I feel like I been there and done that and like to keep moving forward. I had the chance when I was presented with the opportunity, to move in with my BF in his place. I was ready to do so but was blocked by one of his family members. I said screw this I am staying in my own place and keeping my job. My BF ended up moving with me away from his family instead. It might have been different if he had kids. I have known people that tried very hard in court cases to obtain custody of their kids. It can be done through Probano if a partner beats the other parent to it. Each state is different and you have to look up custody laws. The person I knew fought tooth and nail to get custody of his kids but struggled many years with it due to his ex-wife's spitefulness and I will leave it at that. Things eventually worked out. My BF and I are working toward getting married though. I just wanted to be happy and I didn't feel like I should ask permission of other folks on how to live my life. People in relationships in similar situations should not have to either. This is especially when dealing with babies moms, dads, or your partners parents, friends or family. Have your own mind and don't deal with crap thrown in your direction. You don't have to bow down to anyone and if a partner is not man enough or woman enough to dodge obstacles threatening you relationship then its okay to walk away. If everything in the world comes at you like its not meant to be then it probably isn't. Life is too short to not recognize your value when being involved with someone. If deep down you don't love someone enough to spend your life with them then again, walk away and go home. True love, kids or not, will not keep a parent from being with who they love. That is what court ordered motions for child custody rights are for. Interfering family or friends will have to learn to let their loved one live his or her life while dealing with their own. Its not to say you can't keep traveling. Personally I love traveling and I will never give it up if I can help it. Sometimes people just take the wrong roads. I hope you enjoyed all of my post. My new blog will be up pretty soon. My eBook will continue to be on said for 1.99 on seven out eight of my publishing venues. Have a blessed day and good night.


Copyright 8/31/15 S.L. Melendez

DON'T BE AFRAID TO DISCOVER YOUR HOBBIES, INTEREST OR PASSIONS.

 I am proud to inform everyone that from 8/14/15 to 8/17/15 I have been out of town. I went camping in Payette National Forest located in Payette ID. This was only my second time ever camping in my life and I am 37 years old. The first time I went camping was at a more formal campsite in South Lake Tahoe that was right across the street from the beautiful lake. Yes the South Lake Tahoe was in a very wooded area but Payette National Forest was actually in a real forest. It is the kind that you see on tv that usually people always seem to get lost in and very found, or that Jason chases after people. Lol I'm kidding about that sort of but I admit this was my first time I was ever in a forest in my entire life. I absolutely love everything about it but two things, actually four but still the experience was priceless!  The four things I did not like were as followed: I didn't like the idea of having to hike about 100+ft up a very steep hill to use an out house. At first I thought what could they possibly be thinking and what if someone had diarrhea? I am seriously afraid of heights. I'm proud to say I forced myself to hike up that treacherous hill six times. The second thing I didn't like about the experience was when my boyfriend and I was cooking and the yellow jackets from under our picnic table came out and was trying to invade our soda and all of our food. Flies were just as annoying but we dealt with the issue. The third thing I did not like was sleeping on a thinner air bed in our tent. By the morning time, the mattress lost a lot of air and when we tried to get up it was nearly impossible to get up. It was annoying as hell then but very funny now. Our campsite was by a creek which I didn't mind. It was so cold though in the morning when we got up. There were people on top of these high hills that were shooting their guns which worried me a little. That was the only things that bothered me. Now here are the good things that I absolutely loved about our trip. I knew that I had an idea that I loved camping at least from the Lake Tahoe experience. I was not sure how I would feel being in the middle of a forest. I was not sure how safe it was being in a tent that was in the open wild where wolves, bears, cougars, and bobcats were supposed to be. This was a trip my boyfriend and I was supposed to have taken back in May, the week of my birthday May 10th but we did not get a chance to do so. Things came up so our trip was postponed. I have to say I was annoyed about it being cancelled but the wait and timing was so worth it!! The scenery in Payette National Forest is absolutely beautiful! Its like something you would see on television. I took so many pictures that you can view on my Facebook profile. I honestly did not want to come back to the city. I love being in the country. It really helps you to become centered again from life's stresses. My boyfriend and I were able to go on two long nature walks. That was when I took a lot of my pictures on my phone. I also took some when driving to our campsite and from our campsite when leaving. I thought it was a myth that food actually tasted better when you went camping. In my opinion it really does and its not a myth. I also learned that to keep your drinks cold, if you put them in the creek and leave them overnight the cold water will keep them cold. Seriously its true it really does! If you are not crazy about camping, your scared of it or you don't like the campsite, give it a chance and stick it out. I really think you will like it once its tim to go home. My boyfriend and I were able to just sit in our camping chairs at 12am and 2:30am just looking up at the millions of stars you can actually see when your in the forest. In the city you could see some but to me its sort of harder though. I met some awesome people in the campsite next to us. They taught me a thing or two about my fear of heights. The kids, two girls and two boys about the age of 7-9 years old were so personable and sweet! The first day we were at our campsite, the kids kept coming over on our side climbing the steep hills. They made a dirt slide and was actually sliding down a slippery dirt trail. They actually worried me because I thought they might fall from the hill being so high. Never once did any of them mind the height of the hill they were all running up and down on. I thought holy smokes.. if they can walk/run up and down the high trails I can too. I eventually found a sturdy walking stick and I pretty much conquered my fears somewhat anyways. I'm still scared of heights and I have a long way to go getting over my fears but I didn't let my fear of heights over come me. The children eventually started talking to me and I met their grandma who was a very nice lady. Other folks in their family were very nice as well. It was such a positive experience! One day I was looking for some dishes and I happen to hear CLOMP CLOMP CLOMP. I look up and there is actually a huge, beautiful brown horse coming down the very steep hiking trail leading from the out house. I was astounding at this majestic creature! I seen horses from on the other side of a fence but this horse and the lady bravely riding it was only a few feet from me. Two other ginormous horses with a man and girl riding them came walking by. I got to talk to these very nice people. I thought to myself "WOW!..They probably have done exciting things like this their whole life". The lady coming down the hill looked like she was in a total state of harmony riding the horse. They all seemed peaceful and happy and who could blame them? They were in a beautiful forcing doing what they loved! Last I want to mention the thrill seeking dirt bike riders running their bikes up these very high steep hills. OMG I would not be brave enough to do that but they seriously rode like they were professional dare devils. Most of the riders on dirt bikes were guys in their teens, maybe early 20's. I can tell they probably have been riding dirt bikes since they were early teens. The atv riders also looked like they were having a blast. My whole experience was priceless and I would not trade it for anything. My point of this blog post is to say that I really think that you should not be afraid to pursue your hobbies, interest or passions. I now know that camping is one of my favorite hobbies. Writing is one of my favorite passions because I can connect with lots of people. If there are things in your life that you want to try but are scared to do, don't be scared, do them! I'm serious because you will always wonder what might have been if you don't. Try to be fearless and don't let fear consume you if you can help it. I make a rule that I will at least try something before I rule out not even attempting to do it at all. When you are discovering your hobbies, interest and passions do not let people talk you out of experiencing something that could turn into one of  your loves. If its dangerous or can get you killed that's one thing but if your yearning to try something new that is pretty safe anyways, I highly encourage you to at least try. You owe it to yourself to live life to the fullest, or try to anyways. Anyways thank you for stopping by. Thank you for visiting my blog. Below will be some additional inspiration to help inspire you. Here it goes:


****KEEP AWAY FROM PEOPLE WHO BELITTLE YOUR AMBITIONS. SMALL PEOPLE ALWAYS DO THAT, BUT THE REALLY GREAT MAKE YOU FEEL THAT YOU, TOO, CAN BECOME GREAT.**** (MARK TWAIN)


****THEREFORE LET US PURSUE THE THINGS WHICH MAKE FOR PEACE AND THE THINGS BY WHICH ONE MAY EDIFY ANOTHER.**** (((ROMANS 14:19))) Have a great day and I will talk to you later xoxoxo


Copyright 8/19/15 S.L. Melendez

THE TRUE REASON WHY I WROTE LIFE LESSONS IN BEING GOOD ENOUGH

Hello! My name is Sorina L. Melendez and I am 37 years old. I was born in Huntington, WV. I lived 8 years of my life in Pomona, CA. I lived 7 years of my life in Decatur and Stone Mountain GA. I lived 10 years of my life in Huntington, WV where I was born. I lived five years of my life in Russellville, AL and finally I have currently been living 6 1/2 years here in Boise, ID. I absolutely love traveling and I have been traveling most of my life. I am proud to say that I have had the chance to visit 31 states out of 50 in my life. My mom primarily raised me, even though I have had the privilege of knowing my step dad since I was three years old. I attend Boise State University. I am currently in the process of obtaining my Masters Degree in Social Work and will minor in Psychology. I love reading, writing, drawing, traveling, exploring, movies, camping/nature, meeting new people, art, animals, and in general I love life. My eBook is dedicated to anyone who has ever felt like they were not good enough at any point in their life. Its not about yoga nor is anything inside the covers regarding yoga. I chose my cover simply because I like it.  To me it speaks a message of finding inner Zen and becoming one with yourself. Different things in life can cause people to feel very unworthy, unattractive and to doubt themselves. Personally I don' like to see people not being in themselves because each person has a world of gifts and talents they can offer the world. My eBook is dedicated to people to help them become more comfortable in their own skin. I chose an array of topics to write about that personally have bothered me and got under my skin at one point or another in my life. I chose to write about things that baffled me and caused me to ask why things were happening in the world as it has done or was doing so at the time.  I especially on the topics and experiences of being bullied at any time in ones life. I write about situations where a person may have issues with their self esteem or self image. I also cover the subject of dating. I do this because most people would probably agree that dating can be a hard stage to experience in life. If someone's dating experience is bad every time he or she meets someone, the whole dating scene can have an impact on self esteem and self image. I wrote about different things a person can experience in life that can and will impact a person's self esteem. Finally, finding love is a very important milestone a person experiences in life. Keeping love can be challenging. In my eBook I wrote about a lot of the major outside forces a couple can come in contact with while being in their relationship. I despise bullying. I have experienced issues with my self esteem and self image. I have had difficulties when I dated. I was at the point of giving up on love when I found my soul mate. I'm now with my soul mate that I met when I came to Idaho on a blind whim. Yes I closed my eyes and decided to come to Idaho. I never been to this state before. I was invited to come live here by a former friend I lost contact with when we decided to go on our separate life paths. Before I moved here I asked myself and my former friend what was in ID? Evidently my soul mate and my destiny. Finding and keeping love can be like riding a roller coaster with all its ups and downs. With all my life lessons I have experienced, I would love the opportunity to share my wisdom with all of you. I know I am good enough because of all the adventures, good and bad experiences and dilemmas I have been through. I dedicate this eBook to you. I hope that my advice and life lessons I am sharing with you help you discover  that you too, are good enough for whatever surprises life has in store for you. Motivation, inspiration and helping you to find inner Zen are my keys from me and handed to you when you read my eBook. Love always S.L. Melendez




 I will be posting my next blog post later today called DISCOVER YOUR INTEREST, PASSIONS, HOBBIES.


Some additional motivation is as follows:


****DO YOU LOVE LIFE? THEN DO NOT SQUANDER TIME, FOR THAT'S THE STUFF LIFE IS MADE OF. (BENJAMIN FRANKLIN) ****


*****SO TEACH US TO NUMBER OUR DAYS, THAT WE MAY GAIN A HEART OF WISDOM.*** (((PSALM 90:12)))


Have a great day everyone and I will talk back with you soon. God bless!




Copyright 8/18/15 S.L. Melendez

REALLY LOOK WITHIN YOURSELF TO FIND OUT WHAT YOUR PURPOSE IN LIFE IS

A lot of us face different types of personal issues or demons on a daily basis. Some of us might feel lost and not on the path we are meant to be on. There are things in life that could make a person happy, but might also really pose a  real struggle in day to day life. I myself am constantly looking for answers daily. The questions I have are about things pertaining to my life and why they happen. I, like everyone else am learning new ways to cope with things tossed my way.  Some things I am faced with are good and some grind on my nerves. I do believe that we might have life themes and that mine are adversity and harmony. If these two themes are not my life themes they are healer and adversity. There has been times in my life where I wanted my life to go a certain path but it turned out going a completely opposite direction. The direction my life went was not bad for the most part. In fact, it was pretty much what I needed which brings me to my next point. I heard this sermon when I was listening to a Christian radio station this past Sunday. The pastor was saying that the lord disciplines his children out of love by not giving us what we want or yearn for. In the long run it usually gives us peace what we do receive from the Lord. In so many words the pastor(I admit I didn't catch his name), said that if you find yourself with questions that you should not forget the Lords counsel. I really agree with this. When I am burdened with questions or things that make me feel distressed, I will go somewhere quiet, start praying and looking through my bible. I admit I say a prayer, clear my mind and randomly flip through my bible slowly. I let my intuition pick the scripture I choose.  It seems like a lot of the time lately whatever scripture I decide to read gives me the answers I am looking for!! Lately I have been sharing scriptures that I have found peace with because maybe it can help put someone else's mind at ease. The message that the pastor was also talking about was to keep loving each other as brothers. I'm no where near perfect. I don't claim to be because when I was younger there were a couple of people I had a falling out with. I have asked for forgiveness and I make a rule to try to make amends with people but I refuse to let individuals sadistically try to emotionally punish me or ruin my emotional harmony. There is always two sides to every story is all I can say.  Personally with all the things that people have done to me that pissed me off I can honestly say that I have forgiven them. I truly mean that. It has taken me years to pray about things. I have asked God to wipe the negativity from my heart along with any sadness that has tried to bring me down. I am a firm believer in following the Golden rule and trying to treat people kindly with mercy and compassion. Another point the pastor made in the sermon I listened to was that people should be hospitable toward strangers. I don't invite strangers in my house. However,  if there is an abundance of things in my place that I know I won't be needing for a while I make a rule to donate it to someone who can use it. It might be a blessing to someone who can't afford it (cloths, makeup, toiletries, school supplies ect). The radio pastor said to stand up for those who are being mistreated and to not make money your love. He said to be content with what you have. I believe the Lord is our helper, he never leaves us and he will always be there to guide us. This is especially as long as we seek him out and believe in him.  I also wanted to go back to my first point when I started this post. When you are facing different things in your life whether they are good or bad, there are questions you should ask yourself. Some of these questions are:

• What are your inner nonmaterial likes?
• What are some negative things that cause you distress, sadness or makes your heart absolutely hurt?
• What are things that cause you to hate or dislike people? Is it really something pertaining to other people or is it really something you don't like about yourself?
• Can you do something about your circumstances that you are in? Will it matter six months to a year from now?

I truly believe more people should consider going after the things that really put their heart and spirit at ease. I'm not talking about money or material things. Those things are okay. I am talking about finding your purpose in the world which means finding the strings that are pulling your heart. I also wanted to say that just because you don't get what you want does not mean that what you do have and get is a bad thing. Receiving a blessing that was not asked for and different from what you originally wanted will teach you two things. The two things it teaches us is one, to appreciate positive surprises/blessings all the more when they enter into our life. Two, It teaches us to roll with life's unexpected punches, while seeing the good that can and usually does come with a blessing that was not asked for but given. My eBook is on these publishing platforms:

• booktango.com
• barnesandnoble.com
• kobo.com
• scribd.com
• amazon.com
• smashwords.com
• bookdaily.com(Get a free chapter when you buy) 
• lulu.com

As always I appreciate people who stop by. Before I close I wanted to offer some additional inspiration:


***ACTS 3:1-10 (Wanting one thing but walking away with something way better and much more needed).


*** THE MORE WE TRUST THE SOVEREIGNTY OF HEAVEN, THE LESS WE FEAR THE CALAMITIES OF EARTH (AUTHOR UNKNOWN). ***


***I WILL LIFT UP MY EYES TO THE HILLS FROM WHENCE COMES MY HELP? MY HELP COMES FROM THE LORD, WHO MADE HEAVEN AND EARTH. PSALM 121:1-2


I hope everyone makes it a great day and until we meet again know you are beautiful, strong and good enough!!  xoxoxo S.L. Melendez


Copyright 8/10/15 S.L Melendez

DON'T TAKE SOMEONE IN YOUR LIFE FOR GRANTED. HE OR SHE MAY NOT ALWAYS BE IN YOUR LIFE.

• It is never a good thing to take someone for granted. Life is very precious and the person can be here today and gone tomorrow. This is especially true if someone loves you and you care but don't really love that person back. I am a firm believer in trying to watch what I say around people I care about. I know that no one is perfect including myself. I have met folks that not only take advantage of time but people in their lives. I think maybe those people might have thought that the individuals being taken advantage of, were always going to be there but left or passed on. This brings me to my first point I wanted to make in this post. Never ever assume a person or people will always be in your life. If you don't treat them right, or take advantage of them in some sort of way, the people can and will be taken from you. This goes for people in relationships as well as family. God will see their hurt and tears and will place these individuals where they will be appreciated, loved and needed. My second point I wanted to include in this post is when individuals act like its a burden to be around someone. This can relate to relationships or family. When it comes to family, don't take on the responsibility of trying to be around someone when you don't want to. You have a choice, but to do so when you don't want to in my opinion hurts that person more. I say this because the individual will know he or she is unwanted and not appreciated. This type of treatment hurts a person emotionally, mentally and physically. This type of treatment goes hand in hand with only wanting to be around someone when someone needs something from someone. Personally this is a pet peeve that I cannot stand. You look for someone and the person is not there, or thinks other people are more important. Once no one else wants to pay attention to this individual, he or she comes looking for you. That is when its time to not answer the phone or your IM messages. My heart especially goes out to people in domestic violence scenarios. Many people in this type of situation only want to be loved and are treated really badly. These individuals are not only treated bad but their feelings are not respected at all. Most of the time these individuals do not even get an opinion about anything. There is the relationships where one partner takes another partner for granted. When I say a person is taken for granted, I mean the individual is ignored, not taken serious and not respected. The person treating his or her partner like this assumes that the individual needs him or her. In reality though ,a person can only be ignored or taken for granted so much. People all over the place get wake up calls or meet people willing to show them the love, respect and attention they deserve. The people willing to step up to the plate for these tired individuals become little birdies. These birdies are whispering in the mentally exhausted ears of the people being taken for granted.  The new people who want to show love to these tired individuals become catalyst to help these folks to believe in themselves again and leave. The people taken people for granted become a victim. They wonder what went wrong with the whole relationship. Another scenario is when people in a relationship or family fight and leave an argument unresolved. This is the worst thing people can do. The reason is because they never know when something will happen and someone's life ends without reconciliation. Its the worst thing a person can go through,  not being able to apologize for what was said. It will haunt you for many years after the argument took place. My whole point of this posting is to let you know that life is precious. If you don't love someone let the person go or remove yourself from the situation. Its wrong to take advantage of people or take them for granted. If you do love someone and feel like the person will always be there, don't assume he or she will. Show that person you love him or her because that person can and will be taken from you. If God does not remove this person from your life, a home wrecker or game killer might. I'm not saying that to be derogatory, I am saying that because there is always someone waiting in the shadows to take your partner. I promise you this! Everyone deserves love, respect and appreciation and I am being real when I say all of this to you. That being said, I am proud to tell all of you that my eBook is now on:
• booktango.com
• barnesandnoble.com 
• kobo.com
• scribd.com  
• amazon.com
• smashwords.com 
• bookdaily.com  (get a free chapter when you buy)
• lulu.com

 I am still waiting on confirmation for myebook.com and I'm not really sure if I will pursue this platform. My power point/slide show presentation is still on YouTube. I will be revising it soon as I pursue future platform. My eBook will remain $2.99 because this is how my proceeds are divided:  


 **$1.00 for which ever platform an individual purchases my eBook.
**$ 1.00 for my proceeds.
**$1.00 will be going back into the universe for charity so some of my proceeds will be given back.


I am a firm believer in given back to the universe so I can make a difference in the world. Things that I am passionate about are:

• Feeding the hungry/homeless
• Helping the Humane Society
• Finding a cure for cancer/cancer research
• Diabetic research-(My mom and grandmother died of diabetes and I hope one day a cure is found).

I have a busy day ahead of me but I wanted to touch base with all of you and tell you I missed you:)  I will never stop letting my followers know that you ladies and gentle are very loved, beautiful and  good enough!! I may or may not post another posting later today, but another one will be coming soon. I have an idea of what is about but its subject to change. Below is some additional inspiration. Love you and take care:)


******IF YOU PRAY FOR BREAD AND BRING NO BASKET TO CARRY IT, YOU PROVE TH DOUBTING SPIRIT WHICH MAY BE THE ONLY HINDRANCE TO THE GIFT YOU ASK.(D.L. MOODY)**


***WITH MEN THIS IS IMPOSSIBLE, BUT WITH GOD ALL THINGS ARE POSSIBLE".  MATTHEW 26:19


8/8/15 Copyright S.L. Melendez

Life Lessons in Being Good Enough - S.L. Melendez : Book Country

Life Lessons in Being Good Enough - S.L. Melendez : Book Country

My eBook is now available on booktango.com, barnesandnoble.com, kobo.com and scribd.com

CARS OR A SOCIOECONOMIC STATUS SHOULD NOT DEFINE A PERSON'S VALUE

A person's car or their socioeconomic status should never define a person's value. Its sad to know that a lot of people measure their value according to where they stand in life and what they drive. A lot of people should realize that people come from all walks of life. Some people prefer used cars over new cars and jobs where they actually love what they are doing. This is because they do not want to deal with the high monthly payment of the car or going to a place they hate working at.  There are people who deal with different circumstances. Some may not be able to afford expensive things or be able to hold a high paying job. A lot of people seem to use their jobs and cars to feel powerful, in a world that can be scary and a cruel place to live. Having a nice car and a high paying job might make you look better, but the payment of the car and the stress to keep your job has effects on your health when trying to keep your image up. Some people prefer to live within their means and have plenty. By this I mean of what they need on their table instead of a barely lived in place to come home to. Some people are low maintenance and know how to stretch a dollar to feed and provide for their family. Some people prefer to go green and live off the grid, riding a bike to save money and be healthier.  My point is that pride can consume a person if he or she is not careful. In my opinion more people should really ask themselves if their expensive car and high end job really defines who they are as a person. They should also really ask themselves if they are TRULY happy. To me happiness comes from within and people should be more true to themselves. They should also feel like they should not have to prove themselves to others so much. Everyone is good enough in their own way. It just takes each person to realize their value and worth.


eBook is at: amazon.com, smashwords.com, lulu.com bookdaily.com(free chapter when you buy).


****ADDITIONAL INSPIRATION****
WHOEVER HAS NO RULE OVER HIS OWN SPIRIT IS LIKE A CITY BROKEN DOWN, WITHOUT WALLS. PROVERBS 25:28


***OUR STRENGTH IS SEEN INTHE THINGS WE STAND FOR; OUR WEAKNESS IS SEEN IN THE THINGS WE FALL FOR THEODORE EPP


COPYRIGHT 8/5/15 S.L. MELENDEZ

DON'T SIT AROUND AND LET OTHERS CALL THE SHOTS IN YOUR LIFE.

Your trying to establish a life for yourself and you notice a lot of people are telling you how to live your life. These people are people that can be selfish and only think of themselves. These people want to come and go and do what they want, but don't want you living your life the way you need to. What do you do? I say reevaluate your priorities, decide who stays and goes in your life and really decide what is best for you. Example: Your working a job that gives you a lot of hours and a decent amount of freedom. Someone in your life tells you not to work it because you and your partner will not be able to spend time with each other. You partner tells you he or she will be living life the way he or she desires. Your partner also plans to enter and exit your life the way he or she feels like. My point of bringing this up is this: Take your power back and live your life the way its best for you. If this person does not support the decisions you make to benefit your life, then reevaluate if you want that individual in your life. If you and another person decide to get into a relationship and certain things will take place once your together but doesn't its time to declare a time out. You will probably want to think about if that person is meant to stay in your life if he or she is breaking their word already. If you don't have a lot of friends but your very adventurous, you should be bold and go check out your town by yourself. Make up a mini bucket list of things you always wanted to do and do them. You will thank yourself once you do. When you are in a relationship and your partner wants to do something he or she likes, and you want to do your own thing, by all means don't be afraid to do so. This is the same for people in college pursuing a major they are not crazy about. Make sure the major you are going after is something you want to do and not what your family pressures you to do. In the long run you are the one stuck with living out THEIR decisions for your life and your unhappiness. My eBook is still $2.99 at:


amazon.com
smashwords.com
bookdaily.com(get a free chapter when you buy)
lulu.com


booktango.com is still in processing along with myebook.com


My next post is called: CARS OR A PERSON'S SOCIOECONOMIC STATUS SHOULD NOT DEFINE A PERSONS VALUE


*****ADDITIONAL INSPIRATION***
Never compromise with those who water down the word of God to human experience. Oswald Chambers


**The law of the Lord is perfect, converting the soul; The testimony of the Lord is sure, making wise the simple; The statutes of the Lord are right, rejoicing the heart; The commandment of The Lord is pure, enlightening the eyes.  PSALM 19:7-8


Copyright 8/5/2015 S.L. Melendez

STEREOTYPES SUCK!! EVERYONE SHOULD BE LOVED AND RESPECTED FOR WHO THEY ARE.

I absolutely hate stereotypes. A lot of people seem to always try to fit people in a neat little box. Sometimes when people are placed in their neat box, they are looked down upon. People at times do not even give people a chance and try to get to know them. 
People sometimes automatically think that their group is better than the other. I go to Boise State and I love the fact that there is a lot of diverse cultures there. I love having the opportunity to get to know diverse cultures. From a young age, I was taught not to ever think I was better than other people. In fact, this is how I look at it...If God wanted us to all be the same as a whole package, he would have made us the same. Life is a journey and on that journey there are different people that you will meet. When people take the time to get to know others, regardless of how they are labeled, they usually find that the person is very interesting. For one they bleed red like the rest of us. Two, they have their own story to tell. I view people sort of like books. Just because someone prefers to play sports or can be described as a intellect, does not mean a person has a right to look down on the other or treat a person differently. The two individuals should be respected equally. An athlete should not be considered dumb or stupid. In fact I have met jocks that were straight A students and were consistently on honor role. Guess what? They were the nicest people! I love people who are described as intellects. In high school sadly enough the intellects were made fun of. I hated that because to me it was sooo unfair. Lots of people now would tell me "Guess what? Life's not fair!" I made sure I befriended those people. I was about 15 years of age and today I am still friends with these individuals. If a person is described as "gothic", the stereotypes that all goths are witches or worship the devil are not true. I have found out from being friends with a few that they are extremely intriguing people. The gothic individuals that I met are very open minded, VERY artistic and have great taste in music. These individuals are really great people to have had the chance to get to know. If you want to know more about diverse cultures, all you have to do is try to be friends with people of other cultures. You would be amazed at what fascinating things that you can learn. You really don't have to travel out of the United States unless you just want to. One of my pet peeves is when I hear people refer to foreign people as illegal immigrants. I feel like they are referring to all foreign people that way. When people say that Mexicans are taking their jobs lets be real. Those "jobs" are usually jobs most people won't do. I'm just saying. The stereo type that they will work for $5.00 an hour...maybe they will.  Everyone that I know makes $10.00 an hour or more AND they were/are in college, spoke/speak English and had/have their papers. Taco Bell, Rio Grande, Fiesta Guadalajara and restaurants like these are not really even close to what real Mexican food taste like. Contrary to popular belief, Mexicans and Hispanics in general are not dumb at all. They are some of the smartest, people blessed with common sense.  They seem to always know someone who can help you regardless of what problem you might have. Seriously there is good and bad in all races. I feel like a lot of stereotypes are simply not true!  Now we move to heavy people. I think it is absolutely wrong to assume heavy people are lazy or sit around and eat all day. They might actually have a thyroid problem or they could be insulin resistant. Being insulin resistant makes it harder to lose weight when someone exercises. The individuals a lot of times need medicine as well as a special diet to get their weight down. Regardless of why they are heavy, it does not give people the right to be mean or to ridicule them. If a heavy person is out trying to walk or run, I'm asking you to PLEASE not make fun of them by saying "RUN FAT ASS RUN!!" That kind of treatment can emotionally and mentally scar people. A lot of times the person attempting to help him or herself probably has low self esteem or a low self image anyways. If you think that it helps motivate them it doesn't. In fact, it makes you look like a horrendous monster in this already cruel world. Trust me, if someone is overweight and they are out trying to walk everyday, it would probably do them more good to give them a two thumbs up when driving by. Also congratulate them and tell them keep up the good work. That type of positive reinforcement will go many more miles with people. I was hiking up this mountain called Table Rock. This beautiful lady jogging up hill went by me as I was almost to the top and she was like "Congrats to you. Good work". To me that made my day for a week because she was nice enough to take a few minutes out of her day to acknowledge my trying to do better for myself. That was when I discovered I love hiking and long walks. Anyways back to my point. If folks are out trying to walk or jog they already know what is wrong with their weight. That is why they are out there in the first place. When I see people make fun of heavy people or just people in general it saddens me and it kind pisses me off. Imagine if that person was your mom, dad, sibling, friend ect. Some would say "But I would not let anyone I know get to that point in their life" Yes, maybe but not everyone thinks alike or has similar life experiences either. Regardless of what walk of life a person is from, treat the person with respect. This world would be a more awesome, pleasant place to live in if we learned to respect and love one another. Taking into consideration someone's feelings goes a long way as well. People will ALWAYS remember you by the way you made them feel. If they were made to feel bad, sometimes people hold grudges for many years. Life sometimes can be like traveling in a huge circle and you might need that person someday. If you did need someone who you made feel bad, that person will probably be picturing that negative experience he or she went through with you.   As I have said in some of my earlier post there are topics that I will post that might not refer to my eBook I'm promoting. These post will be coming up fairly soon. If there are any topics/subjects you would love to discuss or have an opinion about by all means let me know and I will gladly converse with you. As always, thank you for stopping by and have a great day. S.L. Melendez


amazon.com
smashwords.com
bookdaily.com
lulu.com


Copyright 8/3/15 S.L. Melendez

WHEN GETTING INVOLVED IN A SERIOUS RELATIONSHIP(MOVING IN TOGETHER) YOU MIGHT THINK OF MANAGING YOUR OWN FINANCES.

A lot of people might get mad at me for saying this or thinking I'm trying to tell tem what to do. I'm giving advice that you have a choice to take. I am talking about the aspect of getting married and getting a prenuptial agreement. Especially if you are well off. There are times if you don't, you leave yourself vulnerable. When I say vulnerable, I mean if you share a checking account, your spouse or significant other can squander both of your incomes on frivolous things.  If your spouse or partner meets a home wrecker(Sorry if that is harsh but everyone won't have your interest at heart) your spouse or partner could save his or her income and dive into yours to spend on someone else's car payment or lingere. If you don't manage your own money and give someone else money to pay your rent, car payment or light bill, you might find your self in a homeless shelter with a reposed car. That or an eviction notice that your looking at while sitting in a dim candle lit room. Finally if you are very well off and you happen to meet a gold digger or fortune hunter you might want to get your prenup in order before getting married. If you don't have a prenuptial agreement you leave yourself vulnerable to an insincere spouse with dollar signs in his or her eyes. If you do have a prenup and you want to give your spouse some money fine but just watch yourself. If your in a relationship where you and your spouse pay half of everything down the middle then fabulous. My boyfriend and I do this.  If he runs low I will back him and If I run low he backs me. We have a system where everything is balanced out and things are not weighing too heavy on me or him. My eBook is still at amazon.com,  smashwords.com, bookdaily.com(Free chapter when you buy), and lulu.com
Booktango.com and myebook.com is still in waiting. Thank you so much for visiting my blog. I hope you have a great weekend and I will be back on Monday. Take care S.L. Melendez


copyright 7/31/15 S.L. Melendez


Faith
Acts 11:22-24
Acts 27: 21-25

MIND GAMES PEOPLE PLAY

There are different types of mind games that people play. Friends, family, spouses, significant others, and children test us. People play games out of the house because at home they are probably controlled by one or more people. When some people play mind games with you, it might be because you intimidate them or your everything that they are not. In relationships if someone is not serious about you they will play cat and mouse wanting you to chase them. A person will lie to you about stuff breaking your trust and wonder why your suspicious toward that individual. Some people will want different flavors of the week when it comes to finding a partner and being a commitment phobe toward that person. Some people might not really love you but are only looking for a step mom or dad. Some people are nice to you just to have a place to bathe, eat and sleep. When you don't do what they want the person becomes Hyde to you and shows true colors. A partner might deliberately flirt with others to make their partner jealous. thy don't understand it hurts the other person's feelings. A person might give 110% while his or her significant other gives only 10%. A male or female partner could be a regular mental manipulator always pressing just the right buttons to get what he or she wants out of the relationship. This is especially easy with someone who particularly has low self esteem or a low self image AKA a human doormat. A parent will use someone's kids against the other parent to emotionally hurt them. Especially, if he or she can get away with it.  Parents might not be there for their kids but want their kids to drop everything for them. A parent might play one kid's insecurities against a more confident, favored sibling. The parent  compares one with the other boisterous one. Giving  one sibling everything and not the others is a major mind game that causes resentment. Being a parent who complains about everything a kids does well up until he or she is out of the house and then even into adulthood. Nothing that person did was good enough. Telling a child/grownup that school I a waste of time is another mind game because what is a person's kid suppose to do stop learning and become a vegetable? Picking on physical characteristics of children can last a lifetime affecting self esteem and self image.  Mind games that coworkers and bosses place can be as followed: When either person becomes competitive with you. A person can be seen as weak by a boss and usually when he or she is viewed as weak a boss can take the chance to try and tell a person that he or she is not good enough. This usually stems from a bosses biasness. Other games coworkers play are when people nark you out for any and every reason. There are also people who try to sabotage the good work you do. People acting like they like you and five minutes later they send poison darts t you using their eyes. There are people who gossip about people and point out all someone's  flaws and imperfections wen thy don't count their own. When a coworker/boss acts like their way of doing something is perfect and your way of doing it is simply awful even though higher management  commends you every time they see you. Other games people can play are when your considered an outcast if you don't kiss tail or deal with drama.  Thank you so much for visiting my blog and I will be in contact pretty soon. My eBook is at these websites:
amazon.com, smashwords.com, bookdaily.com(free chapter with purchase) and lulu.com
booktango.com and myebook.com are being processed as we speak.


Faith
Acts 11:22-24
Acts 27: 21-25


Copyright 7/31/15  S.L. Melendez

BUILDING YOUR CONFIDENCE WILL CAUSE LADIES AND GENTLEMENT TO COME(No pun intended I promise)THEN AGAIN THEY MIGHT EVENTUALLY:)

In my life I have noticed that a lot of men and women love confident people. Men and women alike do not like people who are not self reliant at least for the most part. When people have game and believe in themselves, they exude a sexy confidence that can't be beat. The confidence that they exude is charisma which makes everyone turn around and take a second look. When people do not believe in themselves it shows. Its not a bad thing but life is too short not to be confident in ones self and his or her abilities. A lot of people in the world have pipe dreams, goals and aspirations. They want to do them but for one reason or another they don't. When they get older they regret not closing their eyes and making it happen. I think people should be more sure of themselves, pound their fist on their fears and have attitude of "I owe it to myself to give my goals and dreams my best shot at trying to go after them. Its not a given that you were meant to do that type of job, be with that person or find out maybe your not so good at what you tried. It is a given however that you WILL discover hidden talent, charisma and maybe one or two admirers you had because you started to believe in yourself more. Another fact that I have learned in my life is that when you are confident in yourself, you will draw the other confident people in the crowds. You can seriously establish work leads, friends, clientele and you can help build people up who are not confident in themselves. Your confidence is your inner light to other individuals. I have noticed that there is not enough listeners, compassion and empathy in the world. In conclusion I think confidence goes hand in hand not only with self love but compassion for others. If you love yourself more and your confident in yourself then a person probably will be less likely to hate, despise or see negativity in others. A confidant person will be more likely to see the world as a land of opportunity instead of a cruel wasteland. Its not to say this world is not a hard place to live in because I admit it is. The more emotionally filtered you are, the easier it is t live here in the big, scary but beautiful place called earth. Thank you so much for dropping by my blog. My eBook is still at the usual places and I am still waiting to publish my eBook at booktango.com and myebook.com. My power point presentation is now on my Blog at a post, its on twitter.com, Facebook.com and I put the URL that is on YouTube on Instagram. Please feel free to check it out and if you want to leave feedback or comments please do so. I would love to hear from you. Take care!  

ALLS FAIR IN LOVE AND WAR

Since some of my eBook is about love and relationships I thought I would type a post regarding the title I used ALLS FAIR IN LOVE AND WAR. I stumbled upon this title and I honestly think the comparison is interesting. To me its like comparing love and hate. Both emotions are forms of passion. I have always heard hate is a form of love and I believe it. To me its a form of dark, black love or black energy coming from someone who resents another person. When you love someone, I really mean true love, agape love, you basically throw all the rules out the window to stay in love or to keep that love alive. You will try to do whatever it takes to protect that person. You will do what you have to, to keep that person well. You will fight who you need to in order to make sure your love stays alive. Of course this goes for your partner giving you the same treatment. This would include moving long distance to nurture the love you have with someone. Moving long distance to be with a person you love takes a lot of mental and emotional strength. You sacrifice time that you can never get back to spend with your tribe/family/friends. You risk taking up loneliness and anxiety. Everything new is waiting to greet you and your not sure that you will be able to mesh with changes. For the brave folks who take the risk including myself who has been there, done that congrats to you. Also happy travels to those either traveling today or in the near future. Have a happy life to everyone moving before fall gets here. I moved here from AL 1,980 miles, back in 2009. It was a scary thing for me. It was majorly scary!! I did not know when or if I would fall on my face. I didn't find love right away. I found it a year later when I was on the verge of completely giving up. My point is, if you know it will make you happy, moving long distance is definitely worth the effort and sacrifice. Sometimes everything you need is waiting many hours from where you was living your life. The sacrifice you take moving is fair in love to keep it alive.
In all honesty if I had my choice, I would bring our troops home. I'm always wondering if they are okay. Personally there is nothing fair about them having to go to war. Keeping love alive is one thing but realistically when a soldier is fighting for his or her life, the last thing this person is thinking about is what is fair. In fact the soldier is probably thinking how unfair it would be if a terrorist were to kill him or her while there is a spouse or family at home waiting for them to come back home. I don't think this is fair at all!! In fact I absolutely hate death and I wish people would never have to die. Unless they are a zombie that kind of person scares me. I love ghost, vampires, werewolves/shape shifters, and aliens/robots but zombies creep me out:( Getting back on subject, the terrorist definitely don't seem to mind hurting our soldiers. When soldiers are protecting us, the rules should not be strict if our military is caught off guard trying to save us from people trying to kill them, and want to do the same to us. Military should not kill just to kill but if they anticipate someone going to try to do something bad to one of our soldiers, of course they will have to use their best judgment. I will never understand why there has to be war at any point in history. I understand someone, somewhere always wants power and to over throw someone. It would be wonderful if people could just get along. If the United States are defending themselves from terrorist, biological warfare or nuclear bombs to save or country, then yes to me that's only fair. All I'm saying is war, terrorism, chaos, and controversy troubles and saddens me. I hope and pray one day everyone in the world can actually get along and be at peace with one another. My eBook is still at amazon.com, smashwords.com, bookdaily.com(get a free chapter when you buy) and lulu.com. I am still awaiting approval for booktango.com and myebook.com. I should know some thing by this coming Monday. Thank you so much for stopping by my blog. I always hope you are doing well. Until next time I will talk to you soon:)


Copyright 7/31/15 S.L. Melendez


Faith:
Acts 11:22-24 
Acts 27:21-25

LIFE LESSONS IN BEING GOOD ENOUGH - Power Point

CHAPTER 2 BECOMING COMFORTABLE IN YOUR OWN SKIN: (MEN AND WOMEN LIKE THEM BIG, SMALL, THEY LIKE THEM ALL! (WHATEVER IT MEANS TO YOU)

So most of you are probably thinking "What can she possibly be talking about?" Even though I don't follow the many trends and fads that come and go, I do still keep my eyes and ears open to what people find desirable in choosing a mate. This post will discuss breast size, penis size, butt size and weight. Yes I jump around on my post topics because I am trying to keep things interesting. I am also trying to keep my audience wondering what I will post about next. I have ideas but they can definitely be subject to change at a moments notice. I will begin with weight. I hear a lot of people discussing weight and how everyone should try to reach their ideal weight. I agree with this but don't agree with it and here is why. I am currently watching what I eat because I am borderline diabetic. I DO NOT need to become diabetic. I watched my mom and grandma die from it and I do not want to die from it as well. I love life too much to end my life this way. I hear people say that people should be thin to the point where their bones can be seen. I hear others(men and women)say they should have meat on their bones. I hear some women say they want their guys to have meat on them while other women say they want their guy to look like a fitness trainer. I then hear guys say they want their guys to have a fit and trim physique but I see all weights in guy couples. I think it might be safe to say to each is his own. The women who I have met that were into women seemed to like their ladies for who they were, whole package and all. I feel like yeah a physical connection was good, but a mental and emotional connection was what they were looking for more than anything. My conclusion for this portion of my blog posting is this: yes a lot of people want someone who is physically fit and that's fine. On the other hand, most couples I know love and accept each other for who they are, flaws and all. I do think even if people don't get down to their ideal weight, they should try to at least get down to a weight they feel healthy with. Due to muscle, sometimes it can be hard to get down to 115 to 120 pounds at 5'1-5'3. Now we come to breast size. I have heard so many females say that they want their breast size to be bigger. I have met ladies who had big breast but had their breast size reduced. I have met guys who absolutely loved big breasted women and then I have met guys who did not mind that their wives or girlfriends had smaller breast. Sometimes these gentlemen were butt guys or leg guys. My point is that regardless of how you are built or what you are endowed with, someone somewhere will like or love you for who you are. You just have to find that person or that group of people. I call it a group because you never know, you might get married more than once. Keep in mind there are people out there who are able to see beyond the physical characteristics. I have met some of these people at least in my lifetime. They are very wonderful to know. We are all entitled to our opinion and to each is his own. Now I come to penis size which is a very sensitive subject for guys. I don't blame some guys for feeling inadequate about their penis size. A lot of men and women judge a person as a whole just by the size of their penis.(Example: a mans shoe size or hand size). Some people think that size matters and some don't just because they are more understanding. The people who are understanding again are able to look beyond the physical and love the person mind, body and soul. There is also the group that actually prefer smaller penis sizes. This group feels that bigger penises make them very uncomfortable when having sexual intercourse. The group who prefer bigger penises pick individuals who are well endowed. Their reason is because it is their sexual preference. Again, regardless of how endowed you are, there is always someone who is willing to accept you for who you are. Finding that special person is the next step. Finally, my last subject I want to cover is butt size. Some people actually get surgery to make their butts fuller. Some people, men and women have surgery to decrease the size of their butts. Personally I'm torn because I feel like this is a no win situation. Your accepted by some if you have a nice fuller butt. You are also seen as someone who needs to exercise more if you have a nice shapely, fuller butt. I think that regardless if you have a nice butt or you are completely flat, you should love yourself for who you are. The more confidant you are the more people will flock to you.


My next blog post is: BUILDING YOU CONFIDENCE WILL CAUSE LADIES AND GENTLEMEN TO COME(No pun intended I promise. Then again people eventually might:) ).


My eBook is still at amazon.com
smashwords.com
bookdaily.com
lulu.com


My YouTube presentation will be airing very soon.


Is there anything you would have liked to have seen in this post? Again thank you for stopping by and I will speak at you very soon. Thank you S.L. Melendez


Copyright S.L. Melendez 7/27/15


   

DATE YOUR PARTNER TWO OR THREE MONTHS BEFORE INTRODUCING HIM OR HER TO YOUR FAMILY AND FRIENDS.

Before you decide to really get into your serious relationship, you have what I call the introductory period. Its usually two-three months. This is when you are talking, dating, going on adventures and seeing if the two of you are compatible. (Keep in mind dating consist of whatever you and your partner decide to do. Don't let me stop you). In my opinion, I think this time period should be experienced first before introducing your partner to your friends and family. This is because at times friends and family sort of think they have dibs on you. You bring your partner around friends and family and usually he or she will be sized up. Old home wrecking crushes and exes could/will deliberately try to cause problems with the newbie. Your years old friends will sometimes try to whisper in you or your partner's ear not to move forward. A parent will automatically think he or she can bulldoze their way in between a person's relationship. If your partners parents are around, they might try to walk over your head like your partner is the boss of you, and vice versa with the roles the two of you play toward one another and with parents. Your partners parents might look at you like your crazy when you set them in their place. Friends might try to break you and your partner up taking them to clubs for a pick up. Yes all of this depends on how strong your relationship is, and how strong both of your wills are. Just know that no good can come from letting imposers into your relationship AT ALL! Keep in mind too that all that can very well happen after the two to three month introductory period. My point is though that after the two to three month introductory period of your relationship, you will have more of an idea of what both of you want out of the relationship. You both can decide if you want to take a bigger step and meet everyone, or if you want to cut things short and just go your separate way. If you introduce your partner to a big group of people, its like throwing them into a turbulent ocean and letting them sink or swim. It creates friction with all loved ones and everyone will think they are allowed an opinion. When everyone gets an opinion this can mean there is a loss of control in what direction your relationship will go. Yes they get an opinion to a small degree, but it should be later not sooner. If that opinion is obnoxious it should be taken with a grain of salt or boundaries should quickly be set.


 My new eBook is still at:
-amazon.com
-smashwords.com
-bookdaily.com(Chapter 1 is free)


-booktango.com and myebook.com are both in the process of publishing my eBook. More news about these two platforms is soon to come


 As always I'm glad when you stop by. My post are about issues that I really think are important when it comes to relationships and human dynamics. I would really love to hear any feedback, comments or topics that you would like to share with me. Thank you and have a great day S.L. Melendez


Copyright 7/26/15  S.L. Melendez

OUR "SERIOUS" RELATIONSHIP. SHOULD I STAY OR SHOULD I RUN?

So you get into a serious relationship where you are claiming each other as bf/gf. The newness is very exciting and sometimes can make you feel apprehensive. If you absolutely feel like this person could be your soul mate, then take your time and take each day as it comes. Try to get to know this person's likes and dislikes. Get to know this person like the back of your hand if possible. I understand that might be close to impossible at times because you really don't know someone 100%. Compatibility and chemistry play a vital role on if there is staying power in your serious relationship. When I describe a relationship as serious, I mean that the relationship becomes more exclusive with only you and your partner. I mean that your no longer a flavor of the week(Not that you might have been before). There are a lot of people who prefer dating more than one person, and that is fine if someone is okay with that. So the two of you really get along. You appreciate your similarities but also do not mind your differences. In fact, your differences a lot of times compliment each other. They usually tend to be the very thing that you need in your life. An example is if you are bad at math but your partner is a math genius. So here are the pro's of staying in the relationship that you and your partner declared serious.

1. Your partner can compromise in matters and everything does not have to be about him or her.
2. Your partner tends to not be selfish and has no problem sharing food, a bed. money for rent, bills or anything you might momentarily lack.
3. He or she calls you or text every lunch and at least one 15 minute break to let you know you are thought of. 
4. If you don't have a car, he or she takes you to work, school, or where you need to go. Sometimes even if it cuts into their sleep before work.
5. Your partner eventually introduces you to friends and family and most of them like you.
6. Beautiful people walk in front of your partner and your partner seems totally oblivious to the person's gorgeousness.
7. When you dress up, your partner's eyes light up like your the most beautiful person in the world.
8. You share a mental and emotional connection.
9. Your partner actually wants you to come to lunch with him or her on breaks and wants you present when the two of you want to go somewhere.
10. Your partner will help you with projects and endeavors that you might find hard or scary.
11. Doing something generous like driving an hour just to make sure your okay and get home safe when you have poor night vision(True story). My bf did that for me and he still would if I asked him.
12. Does things to nurture your dreams or to make you happy.(True story, bought me a keyboard to learn how to play).

Then there are the things that will make a lot of people run and its understandable why.

1. Lies to you about anything and everything.
2. Keeps secrets about the opposite sex(flirting, chatting on porn sites or flirting with other people).
3. Flirts with people in front of you.
4. Lets his parents talk down to you.
5. Mistreats your kids and does not want kids.
6. A partner is a commitment phobe.
7. Comes in, eats all your food and expects you to support him or her while not contributing to the household.
8. Wants to dip hands into you bank account while saving their money.
9. Ask for money often but if you need money, low and behold the person just so happens to be broke. A day or so later, you witness the person buying something expensive or just something in general. I'm sorry I just think this is wrong!
10. Your partner ignores you or does not care about your needs.
11. Your partner is a commitment phobe but does not want you seeing other people either.
12. Your partner does not support your ambition or the fact that you want to get your education.
13. If your partner does not take up for you at least sometimes when someone bad mouths you.
14. Unless a person is allergic to animals they don't like pets. Its not really a bad thing because that is just the person's preference. It does make things easier if someone's partner likes pets though.
15. If a person tries to take you away from your friends and family so you will be isolated all by yourself. Some friends will try to be sneaky, condescending home wreckers because of jealousy. I can understand why a partner would try to get their partners away from individuals like this, but to isolate someone because of greed is ridiculous!
16. You partner hits you or is in anyway abusive. No one deserves to be mistreated.
17. Your partner stalks you when your away from home. If your cheating and give your partner a reason to have the cast of CHEATERS to follow you that is a different story.

This brings me to another point and that's if you or your partners parents or friends stalk you to dig up dirt on either of you.


 My next blog is called: DATE YOUR PARTNER 2-3 MONTHS BEFORE INTRODUCING THEM TO YOUR FRIENDS AND FAMILY.


This way you can get a feel if you want to spend more time with your partner.  Doing this will let the two of you see if things will be positive or negative after the introductory period. This next blog posting will go hand in hand with this current posting you just read. My eBook is still at the same websites as my previous postings:

• bookdaily.com(get a free chapter before you purchase)
• amazon.com
• smashwords.com
• booktango.com and myebook.com are in the works of becoming finalized.

Thank you so much for dropping by and have a great day!!


Copyright 7/26/15 S.L. Melendez

YOUR RELATIONSHIP CAN END PREMATURELY BECAUSE OF MIND GAMES AND YOUR CELL PHONE.

It can be a challenge when you start dating someone new. You want everything to be as close to perfect or with as little problems as possible. Your dating and everything is okay. You start noticing little behaviors and things that might cause problems in your relationship. Some things you try to turn a blind eye to but two of them are hard to ignore. The two I am referring to is when someone guards a cell phone, staring at it all the time and acting secretive with it. The other thing is when someone tries to get to know someone and that partner seems to be playing mind games with that person. These mind games sort of go hand in hand with someone always whipping their cell phone out at various times of the day. Here are some more examples of what I am talking about. When two people are dating and trying to figure out their compatibility, one individual keeps staring at the cell phone. The person's staring is like the individual is mesmerized by it.(Some might be:/). If someone is trying to get to know someone, and the other pays more attention to the cell phone, the person making an attempt will feel like he or she is boring.


A cell phone watcher displays poor listening skills at times during a conversation with someone. A person will think a cellphone watcher is married with kids or a player because the cell phone is guarded with the owners life. A cellphone watcher can be perceived as someone who is uncommitted to a future relationship. Someone might think a cell phone watcher loves the phone more than him or her. Not everyone wants a cyber bf/gf. Most I feel still want human affection and love. Even though this isn't really a bad thing, cell phones give people less power to call the shots when people are dating. A person does not want to talk or hang out the individual will either let it ring, turn it on airplane mode or simply turn it off. If someone is not are that serious about being in a relationship but the person that he or she is dating has a jealous streak, she could go through your phone and use your previous personal business against you. Its not that person's right to do that but some people do attempt to do it though. If someone is on a trip and forgets the battery charger that person could get accused of cheating going the whole weekend without calling. It is up to the partner to decide to charge the cell phone in the car. Who knows if there is even a cell phone car charger in the car or not. This could lead to one of the individuals thinking that he or she is not being taken serious. If you are in a similar situation of feeling like your not being taken serious because its still a fairly new relationship, stay tuned for my next blog:


OUR "SERIOUS" RELATIONSHIP. SHOULD I STAY OR SHOULD I RUN?


My eBook is still on:
amazon.com
bookdaily.com
smashwords.com
lulu.com for $2.99 and will remain on these website platforms.


My eBook is coming soon to:
booktango.com
myebook.com
bookbub.com for $2.99


Later it will be at barnesandnoble.com


Until we meet again take care and I will talk to you soon.


Copyright 7/23/15 S.L. Melendez

GOD PUTS PEOPLE IN YOUR LIFE FOR VARIOUS REASONS

 I have had the blessed opportunity to meet people from all walks of life. There is a lot of people who will probably disagree with me when they read through my this post. For those who really know me they will know that I love Shakespeare. I really love plays and musicals. My top five musicals I love in this order are as followed: Cabaret, Chicago, Burlesque, Rocky Horror Picture Show and Grease. With plays I love Romeo & Juliet, A Midsummers Dream, Hamlet and The Glass Menagerie. My point of bringing these things up relating to performing arts is this: With Shakespeare quoting that life is a stage and we all play a part, at least for me I think he was on to something. As I said in my previous post, I am a spiritualist. I was baptized as Southern Baptist. I take that part of my religious beliefs serious. I can't put my whole belief system into being a Baptist though because of my life experiences. I have seen and heard way too many extraordinary things not to believe in spiritualism. Yes the people who don't believe in ghost, spirits, God and various energies might claim I am crazy or eccentric. I am just a little eccentric because I don't like to think and be trapped inside the "normal box". There is way too many things, people and places in the world to be confined. I am a person who can agree to disagree. I make a rule to always ask "what if" when new tings are presented to me. I really do believe we are here to learn lessons. I sort of believe that when we become spiritually perfect or divine, that is when we probably won't have to reincarnate anymore. I am not pushing my beliefs on anyone at all either. I am throwing my beliefs out in the universe though. The reason is because I have met a lady who claimed I was her daughter and I know for a fact I never met her. This was not a bad thing at all,in fact I thought it was fascinating. She was about 80 years old give or take, maybe younger. Back then I was 21 to 23 years old. My mom and grandma were the only ones that primarily raised me along with my stepdad. I am choosing to think she was not senile because she seemed pretty sure. I conclude maybe she was my mom in a past life, at least before I was born in 1978. I have met some people who I feel I met before or dreamed about. I know that I did not meet them in this life but we clicked like we did meet. Again this is why I believe in reincarnation. I have read many books regarding soul mates, twin flames, kindred spirits, primary soul mates(People who play major roles in our life: Dad, mom, teacher, mentor ect).  I do believe that before we are born, at one time or another, each person we know plays a big or small part in our life was supposed to do so. I feel somehow like maybe two or more people come to the agreement that a lesson was supposed to be taught to or learned by the other(s). I admit at different points in my life I wanted to be a teacher or a professor. I wanted to teach people and try to bring out the best in them. I am a firm believer in serendipity(A fortunate accident).I LOVE the movie Serendipity because it is so interesting.  I think that the individuals who play major roles in our life, were strategically placed. They were placed at precisely the time when you needed them and possibly when they needed you. I think it might be because everyone could be lacking something necessary for their existences. Here are some examples: Maybe a persons parents didn't believe in them, but the grandparents taught the person that the sky was the limit.  Another scenario is If someone grew up with only a mom or dad compensating for both roles of each parent. Mom or dad, that parent probably tried to prepare the child with everything needed to go out in this crazy but amazing world. An ex boyfriend or girlfriend broke someone's heart bad when the person was young. The individual carried that hurt through life for many years. The person later confront that ex only to find the ex really shows no remorse.  The ex really has not changed that much. This individual is still doing the same thing that was happening years ago. In the meantime the person who had a broken heart met two or three great people to alleviate the hurt. Finally the huge thorn is removed. Why was it removed? Two soul mates found each other in the process of hitting it off with one of the three nice people. What happen to the heart breaker? The person is still breaking another person's heart and spirit. The person might have actually decided to settle down too, who knows?

I believe that sometimes people who have had a hard life might have kids because they were meant to. Those very precious kids were brought into people's lives for reasons. They were also getting ready  to fulfill their destiny. Some of those reasons might be to put people on the straight and narrow path. Other reasons were due to karmic cycles from the past. Maybe one or more people killed someone, robbed someone or something and each person has to pay a debt off. This probably has to be done before a person can move forward. Some people might meet because even though they have kids or marry one person, they might be destined to be with someone else later. I have also concluded that everything that happens in our life happens for a reason. It happens to prepare us for what we might be dealing with later down the line. Half of me believes in fate and destiny. The other half of me is not sure about if our fate and destiny is a sealed deal. Do we actually get some choices in how our life turns out. I think we do to a point but its hard to tell. I say this because I think of how innocent people are raped, beaten killed, or they are in Final Destination type of car pile up. I think to myself surely this can't be meant to be for them:( I do believe sometimes people might be killed on accident. These are things that make me say WTH? I do also believe even if there is a time when someone is taken too soon from your life, whether its a break up or a death, those very people could have been a season. Death is hard for me as with most people. I'm primarily referring to relationship breakups. A child or mom who dies shortly after the child was born is sort of what I am talking about. For a child to die so quickly, I think it maybe was born in a body that was not suitable for it to sustain life. Maybe the child was supposed to teach the mom how to love, and was finishing a short amount of work to move on to higher existence. The mom dying might have happened because her work was done in her life. She was meant to meet her sweet baby for just a short time. Its sad if that is the case but the reasons are endless. Again with breakups the people who exit out of your life could be preparing you for the person your meant to be with.
In conclusion these are the reasons I think we meet people or we are placed with people in our life. To learn to love again, grow, teach, inspire, to think, to become open minded, to become tolerant of other peoples faults, to stop hating and being ignorant, at least for me to believe in God more as well as trust his will. To live in the world but be careful not to be so of the world. It can be hard not to though.


My next blog will be posted pretty soon in about a day or so. I want it to be a surprise with what its about:)


Thank you for stopping by. I cherish each and everyone of you! My eBook is still on these websites but will be getting ready to be put on some new platforms soon. I will post this information once my eBook is on these websites. In the meantime:
Smashwords.com $2.99
Amazon.com $2.99
LuLu.com $2.99
BookDaily.com $2.99




Have a great day! Yours truly S.L. Melendez


Copyright 7/21/15 S.L. Melendez

FORGIVENESS:WHEN TO KEEP ASKING FOR IT AND WHEN ITS TIME TO WALK AWAY AND NOT LOOK BACK.

Asking someone for forgiveness can be a very hard thing to do. It really depends on the situation that people are in. It also depends on the severity of what happened between the individuals. In this blog I divided it into two parts. The first part covers examples as to why a person should keep asking another for forgiveness. The second part of this blog covers when it is time to walk away from the situation. To begin, if a parent was hurt in some manner by a child or family member, it is appropriate to ask for forgiveness more than once. The parent was affected in a very negative way the individual's overall well being. Other examples can include a child running away, or stealing from a parent. A person hurting a sibling mentally, physically or emotionally abusing the sibling can be added to the list. A person who decides to do something bad to a friend because of seeking revenge or just to be spiteful for personal reasons. Sometimes when people do bad things to others, depending on what the situation is, their actions will probably have serious repercussions. If someone accidently kills another person's pet, whether it is a pet of a family members, friends or a stranger, the impact will effect a lot of people. Something like this, along with the above examples, can hurt people in more ways than one.
 A very drastic example of when it would be extremely hard for someone to forgive is when someone accidently kills another person's family member/loved one. If someone accidently or deliberately killed one of my loved ones, I don't think I would be able to forgive them. I'm being honest and I am not claiming to have all the answers but once someone is gone its forever. I do believe in reincarnation but that is a whole other conversation that might take place as a wild card blog. A person became drunk and had an affair, only to realize it was a very stupid and trust breaking mistake. The spouse or significant other has a choice whether to forgive or walk away. It depends on the love both people have for one another. It also depends on the initiative the individual has to want to save the relationship. Next is when a parent leaves a child with a "trusted" babysitter who turns out to molest the child. The child grows up and blames the parent for having being left alone with the babysitter. The child will never be the same and most likely not know how to forgive the parent. The parent will probably always carry life long, locked away guilt within. This situation depends too on if its a dysfunctional, domestic violence type of situation too. A parent might know something is going on but turns a blind eye toward the situation. When people are trying to fight their personal demons, those same demons affecting them will also effect others around them. Different types of demons individuals could be trying to conquer are as followed: alcohol use, drugs, gambling, overeating, depression, promiscuity, stealing,  the list goes on and on. When a parent deserts a child or children the effect can have last results. This situation can cause a child to wonder why the parent left and give the child a fear of rejection and abandonment complex. This complex the child carries through life will most likely affect all of the person's personal relationships.  The parent could come back into the child's life and ask for forgiveness so the relationship can possibly be repaired. When an ex sister-in-law or brother-in-law- deliberately keeps someone's  nieces and nephews away until they are grown up. The ex sis or brother in law acts like nothing went down. The in law then acts like the both of you are supposed to skip off in the sunset holding hands. Sorry I don't think so! A person can never get those years back and the in-law does not understand that you were cheated out of getting to know them. When siblings or family spend a number of years fighting like crazy to be in your life, only to find that when all of you are older they pull a Houdini and act like they don't want  to talk to you, it causes you to scratch your head. You will definitely wonder what went on there. When someone accidently wrecks a person's car, the person with the wrecked car is surely not going to forgive easy.  When a person breaks someone's heart so bad that it breaks the person's trust. The heart broken individual will most likely develop trust issues and this person will most likely have a hard time forgiving the person heart breaker.



Category 2:  When someone should walk away and give up on trying to obtain forgiveness.
Again, this is my personal opinion and each person's situation is different.  If someone won't forgive you but claims they are a good person. True, they might be a good person but  I consider this very hypocritical. How are you suppose to not forgive but expect God to forgive you? Not only that but the person who refuses to forgive seems not to understand that there is no such thing as being perfect, their crap stinks like the rest of us and everyone makes mistakes. Next is when people keep throwing your past in your face or they seem to enjoy holding something over your head. To me I find that very juvenile and a person does have to take this treatment. This is especially true if the individual is sincerely sorry for their mistakes. Someone has to want to forgive you but DO NOT  be a victim to their emotional b.s.  Next is when someone forms an unnecessary vendetta against you and refuses to hear what you have to say about any situation. This type of situation usually happens in the workplace.  In other words, a person forming a bias against you for one or more reasons and it usually happens because of brown nosed people whispering in the boss's ear.  When this person does this, its because he can or due to having a negative attitude toward everyone in life. When someone does things to you over and over and acts like its okay. You do something and that person plays the hypocritical victim. Another example is when you are mad at a group of people so much you decide to take your life back. By taking your life back, you decide to start your life over or you decide to disappear. When you did no wrong but your the bad guy for standing up for yourself or your loved ones. As times people tend to not like brutally honest, straight shooter people who calls it like they see it. There will be times when you barely know people but they act like you did something wrong to them. These same people act like there is something about you they don't like. Walk on and don't look back. Life is too short to stop and try to figure out these situations. However, if you must know what this group of individuals are thinking, I have a chapter in my new eBook dedicated to knowing why you meet certain people and what role they might end up playing in your life. Everyone you meet at one point or another will most likely teach you a life lesson. Some will be hard lessons. Some will be lessons of courage, wisdom, humbleness, understanding. The lessons are in my opinion ongoing. To learn more about why we  cross paths with people/why God puts people in our life go to Smashwords.com, Amazon.com, BookDaily.com, and Lulu.com.

I am still researching platforms to put my eBook on. My eBook is still a very affordable $2.99 in American dollars. My blog might seem a little vague. However, all the juicier details are in my eBook. If I was a stranger and I read my own blogs, they would definitely spark my curiosity. I type these blogs because as I said on my author page, I want to reach as many people as possible. I am proud to have the opportunity to share the wisdom and life knowledge that I have obtain in my life experience with all of you.  I am still learning lessons myself along with everyone. I am glad I get the chance to reach your eyes and ears even if its through a computer blog and social media. I am confident though that my eBook will be one that about 90% of people who read it, will be able to relate to it. I am positive it will inform, inspire and motivate most people who read it. Until we meet again have a great evening/morning. COPYRIGHT 7/19/15 S.L MELENDEZ